That time of year again. Just finished a big chunky stack of employee reviews. Cranked them all day. If you've never written formal reviews for another person, you probably suspect that the task sucks. If you have, then you *know* it does.
I don't know, maybe a different personality type other than the one that is mine might not find the task so odious. Me? Blech.
Spent a few minutes daydreaming a porno theme or two based on The Employee Review...just for laughs, not for actual arousal. I love those cheesy plots. The Stern Reviewer. The Penitent Employee. Bad writing. Even worse acting. Someone is going to end up over someone's knee, now aren't they? If only it were that sexy in real life. (Wait. If only it were sexy in the porno!)
Glowing reviews, of course, are fun to write. I got to write a few of those today. People who'd risen up, taken on big tasks, exceeded expectations. People who not only did well, but have *somewhere to go*.
I don't mind writing really bad reviews either. I don't get to write them much. By the time someone gets to one of my direct report teams, they've passed through enough hurdles they can't truly *suck*. Last one I wrote was a couple years back. Nice young man, hopelessly misplaced in his quasi career path. While my review was just scathing, I was able to deliver it with sincere maternal affection and *beg* him to find another career path before I had to fire him. Please. You aren't defective, this is just the wrong business for you, let's brainstorm businesses where you might do better, okay?
The reviews I hate are the ones where I need to document people's shortcomings in areas that are core to their personality. (Well, that *I* think are core to their personality.) Tell a shy person for 1,119th time in their lives that their shyness is holding them back from progressing, for instance. I probably cringe to say it more than they cringe to hear it..they are used to hearing it by now, I guess.
One chick today, I spent two hours writing her review. I'll probably tear it up and rewrite completely tomorrow. Core, key player for me. Very valuable. Also condescending as get out to everyone around her, and alienating. A thorn in the side of the team, when she's not doing excellent, excellent work.
I'm no idiot. I know where the condescension comes from. She's shared enough of her family background and first marriage with me for me to understand the deep insecurities that lie beneath. If I were her therapist, I'd try to help her. If I were her friend, I'd accept her as is. If I were her mother, I'd love her through it.
Her reviewer? I have to document it. Suggest (lame, I'd like otherwise but really lame in the end) strategies for improvement. I have to skirt saying what is the truth...*nobody* wants to work directly with you.
Did I mention reviewing people sucks? Then there is the joy of dividing up the raise pool.....
There are certain kinds of power I get off on. This is not one of them.
Monday, December 17, 2007
Upon Further Review
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2 comments:
I have a direct boss - a woman I've worked with and under for 9 1/2 years - and a higher boss who is her boss (and to whom I used to directly report before they covertly changed it).
I suspected recently that the higher boss was getting really sick of me, for some good reasons (namely, that I never finish anything I am supposed to finish, basically ever). I even suggested to my direct boss that he (her boss; sorry if this is confusing) was going to fire me.
Later, he called her in for an angry talk about our whole department. (He's just as frustrated with her as he is with me.) Afterwards, she talked about this with me in some detail, including saying, "Yes, you are in danger."
I appreciated it. It's been the little bit of motivating force I needed to get my act together. (The fact that she's now working a more or less full workweek, and actually doing some work, helps. She's had low motivation since her husband was asked to resign as our president; it's a long story.)
The bottom line is, that kind of stuff sucks from both sides, but it can be a good thing too. Your conscientiousness is good to hear about.
Dev -
First of all, hugs. A long term job does have its ebbs and flows, been there to some degree myself.
I don't mind, and can even enjoy, working with people where I can *remediate*.
Person B, she's been with me 10 years. She's the sole provider of her family, desperately wants to advance to advance her income to provide for the family.
The truth? Unabashed truth? She's hit the ceiling of her abilities. Other people, who are more naturally gifted in certain areas, are gaining on and surpassing her. The other people also have more focus in a work day because they aren't juggling so many personal responsibilities.
Wrap *that* up in a bow and give it to somebody for Christmas.
Sigh.
Not trying to turn it into poor me, I'm a big girl, this is part of the job. Just sucks. I'd much rather spread sunshine and fairy dust.
E
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